Denial

Lucas is the master craftsman of denial. This past week our weather has gotten definitively fall like with the temperatures to prove it.

The boys like to take whatever remnants of breakfast that are left over and go outside, sit on the patio and eat them. They love to eat outside. Works great in the summer not so much when you wake up and the temperature is hovering at 45 degrees.

I could hear Eli outside talking with the dogs I look out to see him in a sweatshirt, sweat socks and.....shorts. I see Lucas sitting there in shorts.....nothing else. Ok, I think to myself.....do I let them figure it out themselves or because we've been doctoring sore throats and colds all week, haul their kiesters in for warmer clothes. Because I hate giving medicine as much as they hate taking it, I opted to interrupt their polar bear imitations and tell them to get more clothes on.

Eli, who doesn't like the cold looks at his shaking knees and decides, "oh! maybe mom's right." Lucas turns to me with breakfast in hand, shaking and blue around the lips to say, "I not cold, I ok." Ummmm....don't think so. Sweat pants, socks and sweatshirt later he still insists because the sun is out he's not cold.

Eli's Epiphanies

Eli definitely has the ability to keep us in stitches. Sometimes he understands what he's saying is funny which makes it even better.

Tonight at supper as he's forcibly eating (yes it is possible to force feed yourself) peas and Alison is sitting beside him teasing him (truly a brother/sister relationship has evolved) poking him in the arm he puts his spoon down, with a very exasperated smack, looks at Alison and says, "stop touching me!" then he looks at me and says, "Mom! Girls. They always touching me." I said, "Ok, do we need to have them stop?" His reply, "no, me like them". Confused yet? I was.

Then as we are finishing supper I was putting the cap back on the salad dressing. Eli sits directly across from me and I guess there was condensation on the bottle that splattered on him. In the most appalled 9 year old voice you can imagine, he shouts, "Mom! You SPIT on me!" That took a lot of convincing to make him believe that I did not spit on him. It's a wonder the kid ever makes it through a meal.

Where Did All The Water Go?

People have begun asking if the boys realize that summer weather is over and winter cold is fast approaching. My answer, "they are in heavy denial and have seasonal amnesia."

The pools closing for the season was quite the tragedy. Luckily our town pool is off the beaten path of what we normally take when traveling into town. Unfortunately the town closest to us has their pool located right next to the main highway and we pass it frequently.

The boys thought that because the other town's pool still had water in it that they could swim there instead of our town's bone dry one. Well this week-end on our way past this "marvelous" pool, I hear Lucas holler, "MOM! The water is gone, where did it go, who took it?"

I tried to explain what draining a pool was about but that was only followed by a very disgruntled, muttered, "it broke." We had a moment of silence for the end of summer.

Older Than Dirt

This past Saturday we spent a lot of time (7 hours) traveling to and from a family birthday party in Nebraska.

On this trip we noted several things about the boys and their tolerance of car travel. Minimal use of Dramamine (hated having to use it but the alternative wasn't pleasant) and perhaps it's that they are now awake to notice the scenery and ask questions, either way this is Lucas' reaction to a roadside attraction.

We were on our way home about 2 hours to go, traveling down the interstate in Nebraska, not a whole lot to look at except crops, road construction and more road construction. We've traveled this road a lot but never seen this particular statue of a dinosaur. I have to say it's very realistic.

Lucas starts in with the billion questions, beginning with, Are there dinosaurs here, where are they, why did they die, where are they, when did they die, where are they and can he see one......then he ended with, "Mom! When you little did you see dinosaurs?" Sydney and Mike thought it was hilarious, my view is Mike is older than me, why was he laughing?

What Do Monsters Eat?

Let me start by saying that this post was put together by Sydney, who was waiting for me at the door after work today. A little cover story to what is written: Lucas brought a reading book home last night called, "What Do Monsters Eat". In the story a little girl discovers all the things a pet monster might eat...including pickles. For those reading and wondering, Pickle is our last name. Neither of the boys have ever understood that it is a funny name....until today...here's Sydney's story:

"What Do Monsters Eat?"

That is the very question Lucas posed to me after we reached home today from school. At first I thought he may seriously want to know, then decided not. Perhaps it was a joke he heard today at school? “I don’t know, what do they eat,” I responded. “I don’t know.” Lucas replied. Um…okay? I looked at him and he said, “I read book today…What Do Monsters Eat.” I replied, “Oh?” In turn he gave me a look, “They eat apples, pickles, and potatoes!” I quickly jumped up and said, “PICKLES?! THEN WE BETTER HIDE! WE’RE PICKLES!” He looked and me for a second then laughed for a good measure of time, not because of how crazy his sister can act, but for the fact that it finally dawned on him that our last name is, in fact, a food. Don’t you just love those moments when everything clicks?

We later tried to explain the "funny name" to Eli, I guess he's not ready yet, he still thinks we're crazy.

Mom Before and Mom Now

We go through phases where Lucas gets into deep thinking mode. Usually you know this is happening as he scowls and gets really quiet. This can last and hour or sometimes a day. It does no good to ask him what he's thinking about as he tells you in his own time, after he's run it through his mind enough to be comfortable to talk.

This latest thought provoking period lasted about an hour. His conclusion, "my mom before left me in Philippines when I got old, then you - mom now - come to get me in Philippines. Lots of kids moms leave them in Philippines and new moms come then. And Daddy come and Sydney come to get Eli and me."

He then turns to Rachel who happened to be home this week-end and wasn't able to make the trip to the Philippines and says, "Rachel! You no come get me, where you at?" We explained her starting college and that not all of us could come.

He seems to be rehashing the period of when we first met and when we arrived home. Last week we had an indepth discussion on who was all at the airport when we arrived back home. He asked to see the pictures of the welcome home at the airport and then systematically noted everyone who was not there and wanted to know where they were.

Later on I asked him if it was okay for me to be his mom now. He said, "yes, me no like it when mother left me before, you come get me and you my mom now. You no leave me in Philippines, I live here in my house."

Baggage travels a long way and it sure does get heavy when you're 10 years old and carrying all that weight.

The Book of Eli

The book of Eli (Pickle version) has a new chapter as dictated by his brother, Lucas.

During Sunday dinner, Lucas started reminiscing about the Philippines and things that he and Eli used to do. After torturing Sydney and Rachel about their eye make up, this is the story Lucas tells about Eli.

Lucas said that Eli cut off all his eye lashes in the Philippines. Of course we said, "What?" (Eli is sitting there nodding like this was a very rational and explainable event. Lucas continues by telling us that, "Auntie (worker at the orphanage) was "cutting her lashes" (through the hand signals we think this was curling her lashes) unfortunately the boys, being boys, must have thought they looked like scissors. When the Auntie left the room Eli decided his eye lashes need trimmed too. Except he used scissors. I'm surprised he had a eye lid left.

As we all sit around discussing this, Eli said, "But Lucas do it too." So all heads swing to Lucas, who smiles and says, "Yep, me say to Eli, you go first. Me no do it, auntie came back." Oh the wisdom of older siblings and the lessons the younger sibling learns the hard way.

The Sound of Music

It is kind of hard to put this particular post into words as it revolves around the evolution of music. No not from Mozart to Owl City but the evolution of music into Eli's world.

Lucas has been full of music and dance (and a few other things) from the very beginning. Michael Jackson moves were his favorite. He would hum and sing and ham it up.

Eli was (and I strongly emphasize was) our quiet one, at least regarding music. Eli just had a harder road to travel in the Philippines than Lucas. I don't think he ever felt that he had much to sing about. He liked to listen to Lucas' cd's but

wasn't interested to have any of his own or to try to sing along.

I was working in the kitchen this past week and heard the most beautiful, off key, kind of tone deaf singing coming from the boys' room. Eli was singing what I can only describe as church, school and pop music all in one song. I think he mixed every song he'd heard in the last 10 months and composed his own version. Since then, in the car, outside or in the shower he sings. I wish the people who gave him no reason to sing in his early years could hear the joy he sings about now.

The upper photo was a month before we went to the Philippines to bring the boys home, the lower was from this past week-end when he finally felt it was okay for him to sing.

Grandma Plummer's 90th Birthday Celebration

My mom turned 90 years old this past week-end. We had an open-house on Sunday at her assisted living center. We celebrated with so many family and friends...many of whom had not met Lucas and Eli, come to think of it our girls hadn't met some of our far flung family members. We talked to the boys about the expected crowd as sometimes they don't handle crowds well. As you can see from their smiles it didn't phase them in the least. They even stood to meet and greet people until the cousins who are their ages arrived and then it was a free for all in the court yard. Even better I think Mom really enjoyed the day. Hope I'm able to stand that much excitement when I'm 90.

Do You Know Where You're Going!

Apparently my sons have come to the conclusion that mom has lost her sense and knowledge of direction of the area that she has spent the last 47 years in. I will acknowledge that perhaps my senses are dulled as I did make the misguided decision to take Lucas with me to pick up Eli at a birthday party....that's when I "got lost".

Eli's friends' party was at a lake about 8 miles cross country. Lucas has also (falsely) decided that if we are in the car by ourselves that he is in charge of navigation. While he is very good navigating he does it in a manner that, shall we say, conveys his utter belief that you are new to the country and have no clue where or how to get anywhere. Those who know me also know that you can "think" what you like about my abilities just don't let me "know" you think I'm an imbecile.

After about 20 right, left, straight, slow down, move over, are we lost comments, I did something totally childish and I fully acknowledge probably proved his point - I turned down a gravel road that I really didn't have a clue where it came out. Now before you think anyone was in danger...I knew what direction home was and I knew where the nearest town was and we could have stopped at anytime to ask directions. When we made the turn onto this road you should have seen Lucas' face. He screams (I do mean scream) Where are you going! Not like this! Where this road go? I said I don't know but we will find out. The road lasted 4 miles and connected with a road that he knew where we were. Then you should have seen the "light bulb" moment when he figured out that Mom knows short cuts too. Until then Dad was the only person who knew how to find a short cut.

You may ask what Eli thought of this whole saga....well he had just come from a birthday party, he was high on sugar and swigging a can of Mountain Dew. I had his seat belt on tight to keep him from bouncing of the roof. As Lucas is screaming we are about to fall off the edge of the world, Eli is screaming yahoo at the top of every hill. Tylenol was my friend when we made it home.

Food Critics Need to Cook

We may have found an occupation where the boys will excel...that of food critic. Now I give them credit for having the smarts to keep their opinions to themselves of mom's cooking, unfortunately Mike usually does breakfast duty on the week-ends.

The boys like pancakes and eggs. Now there is an art form to their version of eggs. Mom doesn't even attempt it, Dad is the hero with a successful cooking rate of 75% achievement with "HARD" eggs.

This morning I'm not sure if Mike was after the Breakfast Hero Award or what but he attempted pancakes and eggs at the same time, on the same griddle. Looked good to me. Then I hear the boys' conversation from the table...."Hmmm, eggs hard.....pancakes hard, (sigh)". Guess it just means that there are two more guys who will learn to cook for themselves before they are 18. Ha!

Filipino Farmers

Mike happened to take this picture in the bean field next to our house and today Eli brought home a project on soybeans.

We always say "bean field, beans" when we are talking about soybeans. Eli was quite proud to inform us that they are called SOY BEANS! not beans. Once again we are reminded of our lazy speech patterns - we will try to improve. For those reading that are bringing home older adoptees think about practicing not using any slang or contractions in your speech. It's hard but is really confusing to English language learners.

Back to soybeans....since the corn and soybeans were up to our knees we've been trying to tell the boys not to go into the field because they could get lost in there. They didn't believe us until they went 4 rows into the field and couldn't see the house any more.

Lucas thought he could just follow a row of beans and find his way out, so we had to explain that the rows rap around the hill in this field and he would not come to the end. That left him thinking and Mike taking their pictures.

Manila Traffic Jam in Iowa

Just before bedtime last night we became "noticeably" aware of the quiet sounds of Eli playing in the hallway.

Mike came around the corner to find the above scene being constructed. He asked Eli what he was playing. His answer, "Lots, lots of cars. No go anywhere, like Philippines, Manila. Well I don't think he owns enough Match Box cars to truly do their traffic jams justice and the ones we participated in were about 6 lanes across with cars pretty much pointed every direction imaginable. I think I like Eli's Iowa version better.

Can you see how tired he was? It was 7:30 and he hit the sack shortly after this. 2nd Grade wears a guy out.

Expanding the Patch - Four Legs at a Time

Well there's been another adoption.....pet style to the Pickle family. Our neighbors dog has decided that our house and kids are the place to be. So tonight the official handover happened. As you can tell by the pictures "Wally" is a 7 month old basset hound and all the kids in residence are pretty pleased.

Faye, who is our German Shepard/Husky mix, seems to be taking it in stride. She doesn't get too excited about anything other than rabbits. She just has this disgusted look and walks away when she's tired of playing.

The boys want to know if Wally's parents don't want him anymore. Not hard to figure out the connections they are making. Nothing is easy, even getting a pet that they really want.

What Color Is My Sisters' Nose

So allergy season has reared it's ugly head and taken possession of Sydney's nose.

Tonight at supper Sydney was complaining because she has auditions tomorrow for the school play and she's sounding a little scratchy and sneezing her head off. Of course her brothers were quick to voice their "concern" and critique of her dilemma.

Lucas, "Sydney, what wrong with your nose, it's red!"
Eli, "Sydney, look at me, look at me,.....no it's not! It's pink!"

Followed by what else.....giggling. I wonder what those giggles will sound like when their voices change. I think we need to record them so that Sydney will one day have the last laugh from all their teasing.

Summer's Accomplishments

The mouth never closes - even underwater!

Do you think he's having fun?

If you care to dredge back through this blog to last November when we picked up the boys in Manila, you will find an entry on Mike having to fish Eli out of the hotel swimming pool because Eli was positive he could swim and Mike had yet to kick into the parent of "monkey see, monkey do" boys.

This summer we were determined to make sure the boys no longer sank to the bottom of pools and lakes and took them for swimming lessons. Lucas - what can I say - is a fish, Eli - is an anchor. They both started out a little skittish. Lucas got over that in the first lesson and jumped from beginner to Level III in a day. Eli did move up to Level II but still not a fan of the face in the water. Probably has something to do with swallowing water because he has a small problem, his lips never meet for longer than 2 seconds. The kid loves to talk.

Now it's August, as you can see from the photos they conquered the pool and now don't understand why the pool is closing for the season. Once again boys, Welcome to Iowa.

Come on Lord Ring!

On Wednesday night we took the kids and went to Olive Garden in Omaha. It was what you could say, our send off dinner for Rachel as she heads back to college.

Olive Garden is not Lucas and Eli's favorite restaurant but they endured because it was Rachel's night and I guess spaghetti sounded good as long as they were ensured there was "biff" meatballs.

As is usual there is a wait for seating and they hand us the little round buzzer, which of course necessitates a war of who will hold it. Too bad they have a mother who remembers the trauma of the buzzer from our last visit and also remembers it is Eli's turn to hold it.

We sat down to wait our turn. Peace rained for about 10 minutes until I happen to turn my head sideways to see Eli with the buzzer pressed to his forehead, his eyes shut, then we as well as half the lobby of Olive Garden hear him (say or pray - you pick) Come on Lord! Ring! Peace no more, laughter ensued and we had a table in 2 minutes. Keep praying buddy.

Groucho Marx

You know when you are driving along and one (or sometimes more) of your kids say, "Mom, look at me!"? That is a favorite of Eli's. He always has something visual he wants to show you.

Tonight I was doing the driving and Rachel was riding shot gun. Eli wants me to look at him in the backseat. I told him I couldn't because I was driving. His response?

"Oh, I fix it. Rachel, you drive, put hand on wheel, you can do it, mommy look at me."

As in the way of most dictators, his orders didn't get the desired results. In the way of the Grouch Marx he may have a future as the straight man.

Restroom Heroes

Tonight Sydney dug out one of her many "prized" boxes of toys that she had saved back. This particular box was probably from 10-12 years ago. Sydney wasn't a big Barbie fan but she did have this complete set of action figures that survived my daycare provider days. Yeah for the manufacturer because they survived in fairly good condition.....not sure they will survive the "Filipino Fire" but we'll see.

Sydney was telling them that they were called, Rescue Heroes. Yep that didn't translate so well and now we have the boys' translation to Restroom Heroes. Pretty sure Mattel won't be changing the name.

Sydney is also instilling the fact that yes girl action figures can be heroes, our macho sons say, NO! Once again when will they learn not to upset the females in the family?

Spellers to Your Corners!

This week marks the first full week of school. As such it brings with it the first spelling tests and the corresponding study before tests. Study...arguments it's pretty hard to tell with Lucas and Eli.

The problem we have is that Lucas is older and is now working with an unmodified spelling list, different from last year. It's scrambling his mind. Eli being the supportive and competitive brother that he is has declared it his mission to "help" study.

Here is the problem. Eli is getting the words faster than Lucas. (this week) Can you all imagine the volume of unhappiness that erupts. Separation is the only peaceful non-violent way to go. Hard to do when Lucas can recite his spelling words by memory and then pauses to get the spelling that's when Eli begins spewing the spellings before Lucas can get it out.

Boys sure can improve your reflexes and mobility. If we are too slow I'm pretty sure they will be spelling words through fat lips, courtesy of their spelling partner.

Insight By Eli

Eli and his wisdom are at the same time, old beyond his year and side splitting hilarious at others.

I mentioned last night that he was so tired his eyes were half way shut.
His piece of wisdom:

"Mom. I know. The sun goes down. My eyes go down."

And there you have it.

Art Critic at Large

You've all seen varying forms of art throughout your travels by car. In a city near us they are conducting a city wide aesthetic improvement. Aesthetic being in the eye of the beholder.

It began with modern light sculptures on the main entrance to the city. This summer the city must have found a wealth of unspent money as they are constructing 4 metal sculptures near a new interchange and shopping development. Sculptures is a very loose description. They are probably 30 feet tall and I have no clue how wide. To myself having been raised as a farm kid, they look like the contents of the coffee can my dad used to put extra bolts, washers, nuts, screws and nails that inevitably was left to rust. That is what these "things" look like to me.

Mike, Lucas and Eli were in the car passing these "creative, ingenious, costly forms of environmental enhancement" when Lucas yells from the back seat. "Oh no! What happened, it's broke!" I think he pretty much has summed up 95% of what others are thinking. I'm so glad I wasn't in the car to have to try and explain why anyone would spend money, time and effort to dump a pile of scrap metal rejects next to a roadway, pay for the pile and then strategically place lighting so that anyone unfortunate enough to pass by in the dark won't miss the opportunity to gaze upon the waste of effort, money and sense.

Ham and Cheese

Off to their first day of the new school year.

ELL Child + ELL Child = New Hooked on Phonics

Here we go again....another story from the car.

After their first 3 days of school we went out for pizza. Nothing strange about this. Off and on throughout supper we talked about what they learned, who they played with at recess and regular school stuff. Then as Sydney is recounting her first days as a Junior in high school, I hear the following conversation from the backseat of the Yukon.

Eli, "No, you say it this way... ep s ip a lee."
Lucas, " No! it is espee a lee."
Eli, "uh, uh you say es i plee."

Okay, what are they trying to phonetically say? This went on for about 10 minutes, volume increasing accordingly. Finally I had to stop it because each correction was followed by a punch to the other brothers' arm. The word that our two English language learning sons were attempting to say correctly? especially. Why that was the word who knows, but I'm pretty sure they shouldn't attempt to correct each other for a little longer.....I know, I know it's not gonna happen.

Gender Stereotyping

It's not a surprise to those that have been around the boys that they have, shall we say, a little bit of an issue with what they believe to be a woman's duties and a man's duties and they tend to live by the commandment of boys rule and girls are to be bossed.

It doesn't work out well for them here in their female dominant home life - Mike just shakes his head and wonders if they will soon buy a clue and stop antagonizing the females in the house with their warped, male perspective.

The last few days have been very hectic with starting back to school, learning about new teachers, new classmates and a lot of repetition of school stories and talking about their teachers. Tonight they thought to ask Sydney what her teachers' name was. She said she has lots of teachers in high school and then had to tell them the names. She was listing them and she has classes with several male teachers. It took about 3 names starting with Mr. before Eli caught on that they are men. He stops her, questions whether or not she has become confused, she convinced him that there are indeed "boy" teachers. Lucas looks at Rachel demands she name her professors and wants to know if she has "boy" teachers too.

I wish I'd had a camera. The total shock and awe was amazing. Eli summed it up, "NO WAY! Boys are teachers! Awesome!" (Did I mention we were in a restaurant when this epiphany and vocalization occurred?) Ok, now I'm wondering, what job titles do they think their own music, p.e. and principal - who happen to be guys - hold? So I had to ask. We never made it past their principal. Their interpretation - he's a policeman and once again I'm relegated to the uneducated mother position for not knowing this obvious answer.

The Night Before School

Tonight was open house at school. Lucas and Eli start their first complete year of school tomorrow. Nerves are definitely kicking in hard for them and us.

Lucas still hasn't come to terms with leaving his 2nd grade teacher behind or that his brother will have her this year. Eli seemed totally oblivious, all he's really interested in is seeing his friends and playing basketball at recess. I suppose you'd say that's a typical kid reaction.

I have to say for whatever reason I'm more nervous this year than I was when we started them into school last December. Go figure....I know, I know, get it together mom, they'll be fine.

Boys and Their Blowdryers

Well we gave up taking the boys for haircuts at the beginning of the summer. I braved it, they endured it and we learned how to use hair clippers together. No ears were harmed in this learning process. Who knew boys' hair grows at amazing rates....their sister are envious.

As is normal for the male of our species to never let any moment, occasion or occurrence pass without the need for power tool involvement. Since we cut hair on the patio I guess Mike, Luke and Eli thought this was the best (translation most fun) way to clean up.

This wonderful new male version of a blow dryer (known to the females reading this as a leaf blower) has brought about the no whining method of hair cuts. There are some break neck races to the garage to be the first to operate the thing but so far no fatalities.

Gene Simmons aka Dr. Pepper

Tonight was the first Sunday night that we've been able to sit down and watch the boys' favorite tv show (Extreme Home Makeover) since the first of the summer. Needless to say they were excited.....go figure.

Tonight the family receiving the home were big into music and as a special guest the show had the band KISS meet them. You all (or at least those of us of a certain age know this group - for those who don't - it's past your bedtime :) remember Gene Simmons and the rest of the heavily made up group?

I think it must have been Eli's first glimpse of them. He took one look at them on tv, jumped up and hollered, "MOM! That is Dr. Pepper!"

Light Bulb Moments

It has taken 9 months and many, Many, MANY conversations about blankets and sheets but tonight for whatever reason it finally clicked and Lucas is sleeping under the sheets. Not on top of them, not on top his comforter, between the fitted and the flat sheets.

Looking at pictures of their beds at the orphanage and taking into consideration that it's usually hot in Zamboanga, bedding was not something they had. I'd finally just given up and decided it was one of those battles that really doesn't matter and we'd replace his comforter when it fell apart in the washer. Now to see where we find him in the morning.

Side note: you know the phrase, "a light bulb went off"? That is the expression that literally goes across the boys' faces when a concept finally sinks in. Even before they say anything, you can tell by the "light bulb" expression that they get it. It's really cool!

2 Bored Boys + 2 Bored Sisters = High Heels

The fear I've had that boredom would set in with the girls watching the boys while we are at work.....it's come to realization.

Cleaning up after supper I hear "clumping" coming from behind me, then I hear, "Mom, see me, I'm Rachel!" I turn around and yep Eli is wearing a pair of Rachel's 3 inch heels. After stomping around the kitchen he declared them "scary!".

Mike happened to come in (usually he's pretty laid back on most things - this wasn't one of them) He apparently doesn't find heels to be a part of the boys wardrobes. I have to admit I'm a little leery to see what they may be dressed like tomorrow.

Oh yeah - Sydney and Rachel think they are hilarious and I think they are reverting back to little girls playing dress up - this time with their brothers instead of Barbies - oh no - I hope the Barbies are packed away!

She's Mine!

Guess what happened when we found out the boys' classroom assignments? Eli has Lucas' last year teacher, Mrs. McGinn. Thus ensued the "fight" of who owns Mrs. McGinn.

Eli being the little brother and more than willing to tease Lucas at every opportunity capitalized on this development and has totally enjoyed his brothers' irritation.

Lucas has no concept of changing grades generally means changing the teacher. Now he gets it. Now he thinks 2nd grade may need to be repeated. We've explained he will like his new teacher also but so far he's unconvinced. Hopefully open house will help.

It amazes us that one of the first things we learned about the boys was that they greatly disliked school and often refused to go. Hmmm....that hasn't been the case since they started here and a lot of that credit goes to their teachers. They both go to bed asking how many more days until school. Then Eli will say, "MY teacher is Mrs. McGinn!" Lucas growls and says, "I have a new teacher, Mrs. Dunham, I have her first!" They must have heard possession is 9/10's of the law.

We're Not Done Yet....

Ha!.....bet that got some of you.

I've received comments over the last couple of weeks such as, "well you're done with the boys' adoption, right?" Nope, still more hurdles and paperwork to chase.

We are still waiting on word from the Philippines to receive final permission to finalize the adoptions. Until we receive that we aren't able to schedule a court date to finalize here. Meaning we have attorneys, judge and court to navigate. Our final post placement home visit was done back in May so maybe we will hear something soon.

Ok - I Don't Have To Like It, Right?

Sorry to all of you who are about to participate (unwillingly) in my pitty party.
I started back to work at the school office last week. This week is always tough as it's long days in preparation for 2 days (& nights) of registration.

I feel so guilty. Rachel and Sydney are day sitting duty with the boys, Mike's got the evenings covered. I leave before they are all awake and for the next 2 nights won't get home until after they are all in bed.

I was really lucky (I know it more every day) that I was a stay at home mom when the girls were little. Lucas and Eli don't understand why I've been gone longer these past 2 weeks than normal. No matter how I explain that after this Friday things will be back to our normal days and evenings, they don't get it. I feel guilty and everyone is cranky.

So.....I'm lucky to have a job, I'm lucky I have family to pick up the slack, I'm lucky that I work close enough that the kids can stop in and say hi, I'm lucky the boys are 8 miles from me instead of 1/2 a world like last summer.......I'm lucky......I'll shut up now!

Remember America Smells?

In the middle of Saturday morning chores Lucas came up and gave me a hug and announced, "Mom! Remember I came here and America smells!" Hmmmm. "What?"

"Remember when I came to America, I smell Philippines now I smell America." That is such a loaded statement for adopted kids. Good and bad, sad and happy. Another one of his senses changing to his new life. Not only learning language and sights but even smell is affected. Don't know if that particular thing was covered in many of the gazillion adoption books...if it was it didn't make an impact with me until today.

Mom! Where Those People Sleep?

Today was a "worry" day :( for Lucas. He has these days when he thinks too hard and worries about everyone and everything. It's hard to out guess and usually passes as long as we hold onto our patience and answer each worry.

Mike took us out to supper at a favorite Mexican restaurant several towns away from us. The boys love it cause they can order double rice - go figure. There is construction and a one lane road with a traffic light. Cars back up quite a bit.

On our way home we were waiting in line behind, I'm guessing, 10 cars and there was a string of cars coming from the other direction, when we here from the backseat, "Mom where those people sleep at dark time?" Ok, I wasn't paying attention, so instead of the quick, satisfying answer I said, "what people?" Thus started the ever increasing volume of "people, those people, sleep where they sleep? They have bed? They have house? Sleep in car?" Once we figured he was worried about all the people being out at night when he thought they should be home in bed all became clear and he was satisfied to know they were probably just like us, on their way to their homes for bedtime.

I don't remember car trips even short ones being such mind benders before Lucas and Eli. With the girls we just knew to avoid driving by McDonalds, Walmart and the swimming pool and they rode happily (not quietly) but generally happy.

Dead Peas and Where's the Dog

You would think we'd all lose weight as pretty much our entire meal time is nothing but laughing. We've been working trying to get Lucas and Eli to eat more vegetables...if it's not grandpa's sweetcorn it generally doesn't hit their plate. Tonight I put peas on the plates, so there wasn't an option.

I'd been watching Lucas line peas up on his fork and slowly eat them. He finally managed the chore (I put a tablespoon of peas on his plate-it took 15 minutes) and just as he was getting ready to take the last bite he looked up and said, "Is this dead?" Pretty sure they were dead in the can and even more so after the microwave.

Rachel later in the meal was telling about her day watching the boys (today was my first day back from summer break - poo!). She is also taking care of the neighbors' animals while they are away and had taken the boys with her.

Eli is very infatuated with animals of all kinds, hope he never runs into a skunk. Anyway he runs in picks up the neighbors' weight enhanced cat, shoves it at her and says, "where like this but dog?" All animals are reported physically ok, psychological reports are pending.

Where's My Eye!

Eli is a hoot! He has the strangest humor, he is just starting to understand jokes and is attempting to make up his own.

After lunch he was sitting, waiting for everyone to finish. He shut his eyes and laid his head on the table and we hear, "Hey, where my eyes?"

The kids laughed and he looks up with the face you see in the photo. What a goof!

Who Sat In That Chair?

Suppertime deep thinking once again.

Lucas is fascinated and fixated on everyone sitting in the same place at the table for meals. On Sunday Alison came home for lunch so we added a chair to the table and everyone jiggled places. Lucas sat there for a few minutes and turned to me and asked, "You come get me in Philippines to sit here?" So started the conversation of remembering their trip home and answering questions on how and why we "picked" them.

He sat and digested the information along with his supper and then did the whole this is my place to sit, this is Dad's place to sit, etc. Then he asked where everyone sat before they came to America, so I told him and he realized that left 1 empty chair. He asked who sat there. I said no one. Again the thinking. Than in all his 10 year old rationalizing mind said, "You come get us to sit in the chairs!" Well not the most mitigating reason for having them join the family. We revisited the whole why we adopted the boys and then he pipes up one last time, "I KNOW Mom, but now I sit here!" - OK

Click Play - Wait Til Auto Play Appears Then Click

This free picture slideshow made with Smilebox

Word Challenge of the Week

Some English words are difficult to pronounce. Most are words that I wouldn't even think about being hard to form. This week's word that seems to be a great challenge is being pronounced

"bick wit"

Can you guess the word?

Biscuit. Lucas and Eli love to eat them so we'll have lots of practice trying to change bick wit to biscuit.

Cowboy and His Side Kick

Been gone from home this past week as we are trying to cram vacation activities into 2 weeks before we all head back to work, school and college.

We took the kids camping and tubing in central Nebraska for a few days last week. The girls have made the trip several times and this was a first for a family vacation and tubing both. I'll have to post more on the whole trip in another post.

As we set up camp the first night, Lucas and Eli were running between the campground playground, our sight and riding their bikes, with a few brief moments of helping to set up camp (they definitely needed to run of energy after being couped up in a car for 6 hours).

On one of their stops at the trailer we heard the following conversation.....

Lucas, "I'm not Cowboy but I call you.......................Chicken Nugget!"

Eli, "No man, me no chicken nugget, me burrito!"

WHAT! Ok the cowboy part came from them playing Buzz Light Year (Luke) and Woody (Eli) from Toy Story. Where the rest of that conversation originated is a true mystery.

Doctor Offices URGH!

In a bid to lower my blood pressure I thought I'd post today's joy in adoptive parenting....bitter towards the world....right now you bet!

Today we made an attempt at the dentist office with Eli to have a baby tooth pulled. Our pediatric dentist is wonderful but the fear Eli has of dentists is huge and she couldn't do it. Now we have to go to a pediatric oral surgeon so he can be put under. I guess I was spoiled as all our doctors to this point have been extremely cautious to not add to trauma so when calling to make the appointment I once again explained the adoption and the trauma but ran into an "office manager" who was only interested in insurance and telling me how many times we had to visit before any procedures are done.

I really try to be patient with office people because I am one but this woman would not/did not give a care on how traumatized Eli is by the doctor visits, how far we have to travel, etc. She had her set agenda to how all appointments and referrals are made and let me say she would not deviate. We are stuck which I think is what frustrates me the most. We called our dentist for other referrals but unfortunately this first one seems to be our only pediatric guy who will do sedation. This whole situation leads me straight back to my huge resentment of the medical and dental treatments the boys were subjected to in the Philippines. I try really hard to get past this particular part of their past and try to make myself believe they were treated the best that could be done for where they came from - it doesn't work for me most of the time but I'm trying.

You Never Know

If you can't laugh at yourself who can (or should).

Recently, after the infamous, shall not be repeated day of family pictures, Walmart, zoo and Sam's Club trip, it is not an exaggeration to say our whole gang was "frazzled" when we entered Sam's Discount Warehouse for groceries.

I don't know why I thought this had to be done right then other than I'm too cheap to pay for the gas to drive back to the store when we were within 2 miles.

Anyway, no one was happy, everyone was cranky and when it came time to pay for the groceries Eli announces he has to go to the bathroom. Okay - Mike takes off with him, leaving me with Lucas, a conveyor belt of food and the dubious task of paying for this unmentionable amount of stuff. Wouldn't you know it...Lucas picks this exact moment to play deep, mystical and spiritual trivial pursuit with me. The conversation went something like this - keep in mind I am unloading a super size cart, handing the cashier my cards and trying to keep my feet from being run over by the cart that Lucas keeps pushing into me (this is my excuse for later)....
Lucas, "Mom, you grandma?"
Me, "What! No I'm your mom" (had a bad experience when someone asked me if they were my grandkids, so I'm a little touchy)
Lucas, "You grandma someday?"
Me, "Yes someday when you all grow up and have families."
Lucas, "You be old then." (Yep buddy you are making me older by the second)
Me, "Yes I will probably be old."
Lucas, "You be old, die, I be sad."
Honestly I think my head imploded. I just said, "Lucas stand there and be quiet until I'm done I can't talk about this right now, stop it now (pushing the cart over my feet).
Lucas, "Ok, I need to go to the bathroom."
Again, not being totally in control of my mouth I said, "No you don't, you're bored, you can stand there and wait." After this outburst I finally looked at our cashier.
As near as I can remember, I thought wow she looks familiar, she smiled and I asked if they had been busy during the holiday week-end, she said she had just gotten there from her other job. I, still not cluing in, said, "oh do you cashier somewhere else?" "Nope," she says I work for Holt International......................ding, ding, ding ......she's the administrative assistant for our local office, who did a wonderful job getting our paperwork processed and took my pestering phone calls. It was not my finest moment but it did serve as a clue that it was past time to go home as soon as we took Lucas to the bathroom.

Really Not Kidding About the Bubble Wrap!

The kid just shimmied up the basketball pole in order to re-hook the net! Okay fine but then he jumped, caught the leg from the first injury and reopened it!

Glad he has a no fear policy - I firmly embrace fear every time he walks out the door. I'm thinking of gluing him to the tv for sanity and a break from nurse duties.

Get the Picture?

By the photo I'm sure you've gathered we've had yet another injury for Eli. Other leg, other shin but come on buddy!

Approximately 2 minutes after being told not to ride double on a bike we had blood and bandage time.....again.

I know, I know.....boys are just rougher....boys get hurt more than girls (which I still regard as a gender stereotype)...boys are just having fun. I get it. But have any of you priced bandages? I'm not talking band aids as these are far beyond band aids. We are talking butterfly bandages, antibiotic ointment, gauze pads and then wrapping his leg with gauze rolls and taping it on with the world's stickiest first aid tape (it's the only way to hold it all on his leg). These supplies are no longer put away in the medicine cabinet as we will most likely be using them every 10 minutes, they are now a part of the centerpiece on my table. I attempted to leave the previous injury open to the air a day or so ago - bad idea....it took him approximately 5 minutes to make that very obvious.

We're suppose to be taking a river tubing trip in the next week or so but I want those goofy/gross things closed and healing before we attempt to stick him in a river. Does anyone know where to get big rolls of bubble wrap about the size of a 9 year old boy?

Nature vs. Nurture and Sometimes the Odd Coincidence

There is always the debate of nature vs. nurture in the world of adoption but over the course of these past 2-3 months we've started to notice some mannerisms, preferences and coincidences that the boys have in common....especially with one particular relative......my Dad.

Now the part of this, for those that don't know us, that is somewhat bizarre is that my Dad passed away in 2001. He never met our boys and didn't know that adoption was in our future. The boys know that my dad has died and that they have 3 grandparents now but we haven't introduced a whole lot of information on my dad just because it is very confusing for them to learn all the relatives they meet on a face to face level. The other reason for the limited Grandpa Earl information is that Lucas worries about my dad dieing so will Mike die too.

Tonight we had another of those coincidences occur at supper. My dad was an old time farmer with the habits (food and other things) of those that lived through the Great Depression. Sometimes he really had strange eating preferences. Tonight we were treated to a "Grandpa Earl" moment that I probably haven't seen in a decade. Lucas asked for more cream corn, I passed it to him but didn't notice what he did with it until Mike made a noise at the other end of the table. He made a cream corn sandwich with bread and his corn and ate it. He also does this with mashed potatoes, butter and corn. Dad at times ate with his knife, the boys do also. I will draw the line though if either of them picks up a stick of butter and starts eating it.....Alison still has vivid memories of Grandpa doing this.

Lucas also has clothing "styles" that were common to my Dad's later years, if I'd buy them suspenders I'm pretty sure they would be in heaven. Sometimes, especially Rachel and Alison who have clearer memories of my dad, will comment on these occurrences as things they remember about their grandpa.

So I think there is probably a lot of basis to both nature and nurture to form a child and then I think there is something to be said for the unexplainable things such as these occurrences that make me think my dad knows his grandsons are home and he's just passing along some of himself to them like he did with the older grandkids. Thanks Dad!

Holiday Injury

Showing Off His Holiday Souvenir

First Aid Triage Iowa Style - Thank Goodness for Electrical Tape Eli Not Trusting His Sister the RN to Use Scissors Near Him

Well the Fourth of July has come and gone. This year the celebrations in our small town were strung out Saturday, Sunday and Monday. Saturday was the day for all the cousins to come together for fireworks. It also brought the "holiday injury".

My nephews' wife, Kim and I were talking about kids getting hurt and how you always jump when it's your first kid and by the time the others start injuring themselves you tend to overlook anything short of a broken bone and uncontrolled bleeding. Ha - Ha - don't laugh .....man did that conversation come back to bite me (and in under 5 minutes).

Eli came into my sisters' living room and plopped on the couch beside her, I was sitting across the room and thought hmmm, usually he's more timid but hey good for him. Then he says to me, "Owie" Before I could say what, he points to his knee, I glance down and see this trickle of blood start down his leg (couldn't see his knee) by the time I'd cleared the distance and had my hand under his knee (the mom/sister in me saying - "oh please don't bleed on the couch, carpet, someone") I had a handful of blood. I half way picked him up to get him into the bathroom (the kid has seriously taken a growth spurt) once in the bathroom and us on the floor to take a look (good thing we were on the floor) I pulled up his pants leg to find that there was a sizable chunk missing from just below his knee. Estimate 3 inches long and 1 1/2 inches wide, depth? ever seen the white below muscle?

Mom assessment: too wide to stitch, too deep to ignore, oh, crud there's gravel under that flap and now he's starting to panic. I'm starting to panic cause my brain is seeing parts of his leg nobody has seen since God. - Next thought we have a nurse and and x-ray tech in the house, thus my call for reinforcements to the bathroom.

The "medical professional/relative" assessments: wow! ok! let's clean it up (leading to Eli freak out #2). Everyone's opinion - yuck! I could continue with a very graphic description but you all probably would appreciate just using your imaginations and saving your stomachs. It is too wide to stitch, so deep that we are now dealing with an open wound and he's handling it like a trooper.

Mom Lesson #989 - don't EVER say anything about your reactions to kid injuries - you will just jinx yourself and your poor unsuspecting child!

A Year Ago Today....

It was one year ago today that I got a call from Kristine at Holt to tell us that we had received the "official" ICAB approval to adopt the boys and that they would be transferred to Manila by the 16th of July 2009.

It still amazes me that I can remember specifically where we all were, what was going on, the weather (really important I know) and this was the moment that we had waited 6 months to hear had arrived.

I have a lot of friends out there that have had to or are waiting so much longer. How they continue to wait with grace, hope, humor and more than their share of aggravation but continue to bring their child that one day closer to them, is truly the stuff wonderful families are made of!

Alligator Poop and the Best Zoo EVER!

Rachel, Lucas and Eli behind a waterfall in the Jungle
Headed out on the swinging rope bridge, I took the less
wobbly route and went around.

Still smiling as we were headed to the parking lot!

Rachel and I took Lucas and Eli to visit the Henry Doorly Zoo in Omaha on Friday. It's the first zoo trip since the Philippines when Lucas was traumatized by a camel and Eli attempted to touch a tiger.

We had planned on doing a short visit, seeing only those animals the boys most wanted to see. That did not happen but remarkably there were no meltdowns.

The zoo is a huge place with aquariums, jungles, desert dome, butterfly pavilion, an IMAX, plus all the "usuals". There is no way to go and see it all in a day and have anyone enjoy it.

We started out in the Jungle which ended up taking about an 1 1/2 hours to go through as every monkey, hippo and fish had to be studied from every angle. Then on to the penguins and aquarium. Lucas would have mimicked those penguins all day and by some weird alignment of the universe they agreed to go through he desert dome and head home. Again did you catch the whole no meltdown statement earlier.

As we were going into the Jungle, Lucas was ahead of me and I see him patting his chest and hear the following: "Oh, Oh, Goodness, this is wonderful, Oh! My goodness"

They bought the customary stuffed animals, Eli chose an alligator and Lucas bought a turtle. On the way home, both of the boys are playing with them when I hear a whole, very descriptive reenactment of alligator poop. I finally put a halt to it after it had continued way past funny and Eli spouts off...."but Mom alligators poop all the time!" Thank you for that lesson son. Next time perhaps we shouldn't stay at the exhibits long enough to make a toileting study.

Things Not to Do In a Day.....

Things not to do on a single day:

1. Take your family of seven to have family pictures done when your adult children and husband have appointments immediately following.
2. Pick out and order aforementioned pictures in 20 minutes.
3. Try to pick up back ordered lamps from furniture purchase that were promised to be delivered today, yep that didn't happen.
4. Take your 2 sons to their first zoo trip (with the help of Rachel - thanks Rachel!)
5. Try to start cleaning for a birthday party (1 month late and 4th of July dinner)

Tired You Bet! Good day? Amazingly yes.