Saturday, July 31, 2010

Remember America Smells?

In the middle of Saturday morning chores Lucas came up and gave me a hug and announced, "Mom! Remember I came here and America smells!" Hmmmm. "What?"

"Remember when I came to America, I smell Philippines now I smell America." That is such a loaded statement for adopted kids. Good and bad, sad and happy. Another one of his senses changing to his new life. Not only learning language and sights but even smell is affected. Don't know if that particular thing was covered in many of the gazillion adoption books...if it was it didn't make an impact with me until today.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Mom! Where Those People Sleep?

Today was a "worry" day :( for Lucas. He has these days when he thinks too hard and worries about everyone and everything. It's hard to out guess and usually passes as long as we hold onto our patience and answer each worry.

Mike took us out to supper at a favorite Mexican restaurant several towns away from us. The boys love it cause they can order double rice - go figure. There is construction and a one lane road with a traffic light. Cars back up quite a bit.

On our way home we were waiting in line behind, I'm guessing, 10 cars and there was a string of cars coming from the other direction, when we here from the backseat, "Mom where those people sleep at dark time?" Ok, I wasn't paying attention, so instead of the quick, satisfying answer I said, "what people?" Thus started the ever increasing volume of "people, those people, sleep where they sleep? They have bed? They have house? Sleep in car?" Once we figured he was worried about all the people being out at night when he thought they should be home in bed all became clear and he was satisfied to know they were probably just like us, on their way to their homes for bedtime.

I don't remember car trips even short ones being such mind benders before Lucas and Eli. With the girls we just knew to avoid driving by McDonalds, Walmart and the swimming pool and they rode happily (not quietly) but generally happy.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Dead Peas and Where's the Dog

You would think we'd all lose weight as pretty much our entire meal time is nothing but laughing. We've been working trying to get Lucas and Eli to eat more vegetables...if it's not grandpa's sweetcorn it generally doesn't hit their plate. Tonight I put peas on the plates, so there wasn't an option.

I'd been watching Lucas line peas up on his fork and slowly eat them. He finally managed the chore (I put a tablespoon of peas on his plate-it took 15 minutes) and just as he was getting ready to take the last bite he looked up and said, "Is this dead?" Pretty sure they were dead in the can and even more so after the microwave.

Rachel later in the meal was telling about her day watching the boys (today was my first day back from summer break - poo!). She is also taking care of the neighbors' animals while they are away and had taken the boys with her.

Eli is very infatuated with animals of all kinds, hope he never runs into a skunk. Anyway he runs in picks up the neighbors' weight enhanced cat, shoves it at her and says, "where like this but dog?" All animals are reported physically ok, psychological reports are pending.

Friday, July 23, 2010

Where's My Eye!


Eli is a hoot! He has the strangest humor, he is just starting to understand jokes and is attempting to make up his own.

After lunch he was sitting, waiting for everyone to finish. He shut his eyes and laid his head on the table and we hear, "Hey, where my eyes?"

The kids laughed and he looks up with the face you see in the photo. What a goof!

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Who Sat In That Chair?

Suppertime deep thinking once again.

Lucas is fascinated and fixated on everyone sitting in the same place at the table for meals. On Sunday Alison came home for lunch so we added a chair to the table and everyone jiggled places. Lucas sat there for a few minutes and turned to me and asked, "You come get me in Philippines to sit here?" So started the conversation of remembering their trip home and answering questions on how and why we "picked" them.

He sat and digested the information along with his supper and then did the whole this is my place to sit, this is Dad's place to sit, etc. Then he asked where everyone sat before they came to America, so I told him and he realized that left 1 empty chair. He asked who sat there. I said no one. Again the thinking. Than in all his 10 year old rationalizing mind said, "You come get us to sit in the chairs!" Well not the most mitigating reason for having them join the family. We revisited the whole why we adopted the boys and then he pipes up one last time, "I KNOW Mom, but now I sit here!" - OK

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Word Challenge of the Week

Some English words are difficult to pronounce. Most are words that I wouldn't even think about being hard to form. This week's word that seems to be a great challenge is being pronounced
"bick wit"
Can you guess the word?
Biscuit. Lucas and Eli love to eat them so we'll have lots of practice trying to change bick wit to biscuit.

Cowboy and His Side Kick

Been gone from home this past week as we are trying to cram vacation activities into 2 weeks before we all head back to work, school and college.

We took the kids camping and tubing in central Nebraska for a few days last week. The girls have made the trip several times and this was a first for a family vacation and tubing both. I'll have to post more on the whole trip in another post.

As we set up camp the first night, Lucas and Eli were running between the campground playground, our sight and riding their bikes, with a few brief moments of helping to set up camp (they definitely needed to run of energy after being couped up in a car for 6 hours).

On one of their stops at the trailer we heard the following conversation.....
Lucas, "I'm not Cowboy but I call you.......................Chicken Nugget!"
Eli, "No man, me no chicken nugget, me burrito!"

WHAT! Ok the cowboy part came from them playing Buzz Light Year (Luke) and Woody (Eli) from Toy Story. Where the rest of that conversation originated is a true mystery.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Doctor Offices URGH!

In a bid to lower my blood pressure I thought I'd post today's joy in adoptive parenting....bitter towards the world....right now you bet!

Today we made an attempt at the dentist office with Eli to have a baby tooth pulled. Our pediatric dentist is wonderful but the fear Eli has of dentists is huge and she couldn't do it. Now we have to go to a pediatric oral surgeon so he can be put under. I guess I was spoiled as all our doctors to this point have been extremely cautious to not add to trauma so when calling to make the appointment I once again explained the adoption and the trauma but ran into an "office manager" who was only interested in insurance and telling me how many times we had to visit before any procedures are done.

I really try to be patient with office people because I am one but this woman would not/did not give a care on how traumatized Eli is by the doctor visits, how far we have to travel, etc. She had her set agenda to how all appointments and referrals are made and let me say she would not deviate. We are stuck which I think is what frustrates me the most. We called our dentist for other referrals but unfortunately this first one seems to be our only pediatric guy who will do sedation. This whole situation leads me straight back to my huge resentment of the medical and dental treatments the boys were subjected to in the Philippines. I try really hard to get past this particular part of their past and try to make myself believe they were treated the best that could be done for where they came from - it doesn't work for me most of the time but I'm trying.

Monday, July 12, 2010

You Never Know

If you can't laugh at yourself who can (or should).

Recently, after the infamous, shall not be repeated day of family pictures, Walmart, zoo and Sam's Club trip, it is not an exaggeration to say our whole gang was "frazzled" when we entered Sam's Discount Warehouse for groceries.

I don't know why I thought this had to be done right then other than I'm too cheap to pay for the gas to drive back to the store when we were within 2 miles.

Anyway, no one was happy, everyone was cranky and when it came time to pay for the groceries Eli announces he has to go to the bathroom. Okay - Mike takes off with him, leaving me with Lucas, a conveyor belt of food and the dubious task of paying for this unmentionable amount of stuff. Wouldn't you know it...Lucas picks this exact moment to play deep, mystical and spiritual trivial pursuit with me. The conversation went something like this - keep in mind I am unloading a super size cart, handing the cashier my cards and trying to keep my feet from being run over by the cart that Lucas keeps pushing into me (this is my excuse for later)....
Lucas, "Mom, you grandma?"
Me, "What! No I'm your mom" (had a bad experience when someone asked me if they were my grandkids, so I'm a little touchy)
Lucas, "You grandma someday?"
Me, "Yes someday when you all grow up and have families."
Lucas, "You be old then." (Yep buddy you are making me older by the second)
Me, "Yes I will probably be old."
Lucas, "You be old, die, I be sad."
Honestly I think my head imploded. I just said, "Lucas stand there and be quiet until I'm done I can't talk about this right now, stop it now (pushing the cart over my feet).
Lucas, "Ok, I need to go to the bathroom."
Again, not being totally in control of my mouth I said, "No you don't, you're bored, you can stand there and wait." After this outburst I finally looked at our cashier.
As near as I can remember, I thought wow she looks familiar, she smiled and I asked if they had been busy during the holiday week-end, she said she had just gotten there from her other job. I, still not cluing in, said, "oh do you cashier somewhere else?" "Nope," she says I work for Holt International......................ding, ding, ding ......she's the administrative assistant for our local office, who did a wonderful job getting our paperwork processed and took my pestering phone calls. It was not my finest moment but it did serve as a clue that it was past time to go home as soon as we took Lucas to the bathroom.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Really Not Kidding About the Bubble Wrap!

The kid just shimmied up the basketball pole in order to re-hook the net! Okay fine but then he jumped, caught the leg from the first injury and reopened it!

Glad he has a no fear policy - I firmly embrace fear every time he walks out the door. I'm thinking of gluing him to the tv for sanity and a break from nurse duties.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Get the Picture?


By the photo I'm sure you've gathered we've had yet another injury for Eli. Other leg, other shin but come on buddy!

Approximately 2 minutes after being told not to ride double on a bike we had blood and bandage time.....again.

I know, I know.....boys are just rougher....boys get hurt more than girls (which I still regard as a gender stereotype)...boys are just having fun. I get it. But have any of you priced bandages? I'm not talking band aids as these are far beyond band aids. We are talking butterfly bandages, antibiotic ointment, gauze pads and then wrapping his leg with gauze rolls and taping it on with the world's stickiest first aid tape (it's the only way to hold it all on his leg). These supplies are no longer put away in the medicine cabinet as we will most likely be using them every 10 minutes, they are now a part of the centerpiece on my table. I attempted to leave the previous injury open to the air a day or so ago - bad idea....it took him approximately 5 minutes to make that very obvious.

We're suppose to be taking a river tubing trip in the next week or so but I want those goofy/gross things closed and healing before we attempt to stick him in a river. Does anyone know where to get big rolls of bubble wrap about the size of a 9 year old boy?

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Nature vs. Nurture and Sometimes the Odd Coincidence


There is always the debate of nature vs. nurture in the world of adoption but over the course of these past 2-3 months we've started to notice some mannerisms, preferences and coincidences that the boys have in common....especially with one particular relative......my Dad.

Now the part of this, for those that don't know us, that is somewhat bizarre is that my Dad passed away in 2001. He never met our boys and didn't know that adoption was in our future. The boys know that my dad has died and that they have 3 grandparents now but we haven't introduced a whole lot of information on my dad just because it is very confusing for them to learn all the relatives they meet on a face to face level. The other reason for the limited Grandpa Earl information is that Lucas worries about my dad dieing so will Mike die too.
Tonight we had another of those coincidences occur at supper. My dad was an old time farmer with the habits (food and other things) of those that lived through the Great Depression. Sometimes he really had strange eating preferences. Tonight we were treated to a "Grandpa Earl" moment that I probably haven't seen in a decade. Lucas asked for more cream corn, I passed it to him but didn't notice what he did with it until Mike made a noise at the other end of the table. He made a cream corn sandwich with bread and his corn and ate it. He also does this with mashed potatoes, butter and corn. Dad at times ate with his knife, the boys do also. I will draw the line though if either of them picks up a stick of butter and starts eating it.....Alison still has vivid memories of Grandpa doing this.

Lucas also has clothing "styles" that were common to my Dad's later years, if I'd buy them suspenders I'm pretty sure they would be in heaven. Sometimes, especially Rachel and Alison who have clearer memories of my dad, will comment on these occurrences as things they remember about their grandpa.

So I think there is probably a lot of basis to both nature and nurture to form a child and then I think there is something to be said for the unexplainable things such as these occurrences that make me think my dad knows his grandsons are home and he's just passing along some of himself to them like he did with the older grandkids. Thanks Dad!

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Holiday Injury

Showing Off His Holiday Souvenir
First Aid Triage Iowa Style - Thank Goodness for Electrical Tape Eli Not Trusting His Sister the RN to Use Scissors Near Him

Well the Fourth of July has come and gone. This year the celebrations in our small town were strung out Saturday, Sunday and Monday. Saturday was the day for all the cousins to come together for fireworks. It also brought the "holiday injury".

My nephews' wife, Kim and I were talking about kids getting hurt and how you always jump when it's your first kid and by the time the others start injuring themselves you tend to overlook anything short of a broken bone and uncontrolled bleeding. Ha - Ha - don't laugh .....man did that conversation come back to bite me (and in under 5 minutes).

Eli came into my sisters' living room and plopped on the couch beside her, I was sitting across the room and thought hmmm, usually he's more timid but hey good for him. Then he says to me, "Owie" Before I could say what, he points to his knee, I glance down and see this trickle of blood start down his leg (couldn't see his knee) by the time I'd cleared the distance and had my hand under his knee (the mom/sister in me saying - "oh please don't bleed on the couch, carpet, someone") I had a handful of blood. I half way picked him up to get him into the bathroom (the kid has seriously taken a growth spurt) once in the bathroom and us on the floor to take a look (good thing we were on the floor) I pulled up his pants leg to find that there was a sizable chunk missing from just below his knee. Estimate 3 inches long and 1 1/2 inches wide, depth? ever seen the white below muscle?

Mom assessment: too wide to stitch, too deep to ignore, oh, crud there's gravel under that flap and now he's starting to panic. I'm starting to panic cause my brain is seeing parts of his leg nobody has seen since God. - Next thought we have a nurse and and x-ray tech in the house, thus my call for reinforcements to the bathroom.

The "medical professional/relative" assessments: wow! ok! let's clean it up (leading to Eli freak out #2). Everyone's opinion - yuck! I could continue with a very graphic description but you all probably would appreciate just using your imaginations and saving your stomachs. It is too wide to stitch, so deep that we are now dealing with an open wound and he's handling it like a trooper.
Mom Lesson #989 - don't EVER say anything about your reactions to kid injuries - you will just jinx yourself and your poor unsuspecting child!

Saturday, July 3, 2010

A Year Ago Today....

It was one year ago today that I got a call from Kristine at Holt to tell us that we had received the "official" ICAB approval to adopt the boys and that they would be transferred to Manila by the 16th of July 2009.

It still amazes me that I can remember specifically where we all were, what was going on, the weather (really important I know) and this was the moment that we had waited 6 months to hear had arrived.

I have a lot of friends out there that have had to or are waiting so much longer. How they continue to wait with grace, hope, humor and more than their share of aggravation but continue to bring their child that one day closer to them, is truly the stuff wonderful families are made of!

Friday, July 2, 2010

Alligator Poop and the Best Zoo EVER!

Rachel, Lucas and Eli behind a waterfall in the Jungle
Headed out on the swinging rope bridge, I took the less
wobbly route and went around.
Still smiling as we were headed to the parking lot!

Rachel and I took Lucas and Eli to visit the Henry Doorly Zoo in Omaha on Friday. It's the first zoo trip since the Philippines when Lucas was traumatized by a camel and Eli attempted to touch a tiger.

We had planned on doing a short visit, seeing only those animals the boys most wanted to see. That did not happen but remarkably there were no meltdowns.

The zoo is a huge place with aquariums, jungles, desert dome, butterfly pavilion, an IMAX, plus all the "usuals". There is no way to go and see it all in a day and have anyone enjoy it.

We started out in the Jungle which ended up taking about an 1 1/2 hours to go through as every monkey, hippo and fish had to be studied from every angle. Then on to the penguins and aquarium. Lucas would have mimicked those penguins all day and by some weird alignment of the universe they agreed to go through he desert dome and head home. Again did you catch the whole no meltdown statement earlier.

As we were going into the Jungle, Lucas was ahead of me and I see him patting his chest and hear the following: "Oh, Oh, Goodness, this is wonderful, Oh! My goodness"

They bought the customary stuffed animals, Eli chose an alligator and Lucas bought a turtle. On the way home, both of the boys are playing with them when I hear a whole, very descriptive reenactment of alligator poop. I finally put a halt to it after it had continued way past funny and Eli spouts off...."but Mom alligators poop all the time!" Thank you for that lesson son. Next time perhaps we shouldn't stay at the exhibits long enough to make a toileting study.

Things Not to Do In a Day.....

Things not to do on a single day:
  1. Take your family of seven to have family pictures done when your adult children and husband have appointments immediately following.
  2. Pick out and order aforementioned pictures in 20 minutes.
  3. Try to pick up back ordered lamps from furniture purchase that were promised to be delivered today, yep that didn't happen.
  4. Take your 2 sons to their first zoo trip (with the help of Rachel - thanks Rachel!)
  5. Try to start cleaning for a birthday party (1 month late and 4th of July dinner)

Tired You Bet! Good day? Amazingly yes.