Celebrating A Son's Milestone and Thanking His Birth Family

I told you that I was having a little trouble posting about this particular milestone in Lucas' life....his 13th birthday!  No one could anticipate, plan or celebrate a birthday more than he does.  Finally becoming a teenager...a goal that he's had since we met him at 9 years old....it's a big deal.  Really BIG!

As we all celebrate with him, I also am reminded that he has had an entire Filipino family who has not been able to celebrate the last decade of his life.  To track Lucas (and Eli's) life from it's start on a small island off Mindanao, to the orphanage in Zamboanga, to a Manila foster home to their home here with us, to our adoption agency staff, to our friends and community, it absolutely blows my mind to realize all that had to happen for us to become their parents.  How many people struggled, agonized, worked and loved these two guys in order to give them a different life, they  are forever a part of our lives.  Some we know, some we will never be able to name, all have touched their lives immeasurably.

I'm especially drawn to thoughts of the boys' biological mother.  Most adoptive parents wonder...a lot...I think.  Does she remember the date, does she remember the 3 year old that is turning 13 today?  I think about their uncle who may have tried but was unable to care for them, the workers at RSCC-Zamboanga who documented their arrival and were the ones to give us the earliest record of their experiences.  I wonder if the care givers at RSCC who saw the boys celebrate 5 years of milestones ever remember.  I wonder if the social worker who helped them transition to the Manila foster home remembers or their foster lola...they remember her always.  I wonder.  A lot.

Realistically I know that not all of these people remember.  So we will choose to remember and honor them for whatever part they played in bringing the boys home to us.    I will choose to say a thank you to their mother who chose to make an impossible decision.  I will say a prayer that her heart is comforted especially on tough days when she remembers.

Although the pictures and scenarios we've pieced together may not always be the most accurate, I do know for sure that on this day...his 13th birthday....we have a son who is compassionate, opinionated, funny, handsome, smart, and aggravating at times.  We have a son we love and wish he experiences the most wonderful things in life.  We celebrate not only his 13th Birthday but all those struggles, love and work that allow us to do so.