We are traveling down memory lane with Lucas. A lot of discussion centering around the Philippines. He very much wants to look for a friend of his that was adopted into an American family so we have had several days of talking about their time together.
Some people ask if we think their memories are accurate. For the most part I believe so, they are consistent over time, they don't vary and both boys share the same stories at different times.
To our American sensibilities and standards a lot of the situations they relate are slightly shocking. We have learned that we need to broaden our horizons...we try...until we have to explain that a particular activity is not safe or how we deal with things here....in a family....in America and then try and bridge the gap of why it was ok, or not, in the Philippines and why we believe as parents they should do something differently now. It's a delicate line of not pointing fingers or making generalizations about situations we are piecing together. Not an exact science by any means.
After a whole meal of stories about walking to church, home from school, playing with friends, guards, guns and theft, Mike said to Lucas, "Wow, I'm always shocked at the things you remember and talk about." Lucas' reply? "Dad. If you ever go back to the Philippines with me sometime I could show you things that would really shock you." I just bet he could.
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