Mom. I Need a New Brother!

Sunday was a rare day when everyone was home for dinner. Alison had the week end off, Rachel home from school, Sydney didn't have to leave for work until later, Mike, Lucas and Eli were home too.

These are hilariously fun times. Alison and I were talking later that no one will ever believe or truly understand when we try to relay the conversations that take place around the table. You just can't make these things up or do justice to the circumstances.

One such conversation from Sunday; Lucas (with the straightest face and he was serious) announces, "Mom. I need a new brother." I thought maybe I'd missed an altercation between him and Eli. Eli seemed to be delving into his fourth piece of roast beef and with a mouth full I didn't think he could earn banishment from the family. Lucas went on to explain, "I need a new brother then there would be three boys and three girls. Its not fair, more girls than boys." I guess he thought he'd even the playing field.

As a side note Sydney almost gave herself whiplash shaking her head no. I think she thinks the ratio of boys to girls is just fine.

Mom. You can have my flowers.

What mother doesn't love to get flowers from her son?

All is not as it may appear in this statement. We were walking to the Yukon after a successful (somewhat sad for the other side) baseball game. We finally quit keeping score. Lucas and Eli both had a great game, hits, scores, stealing. It was a good day for Pickle athletics.

The flowers Lucas was offering me? Sunflower seeds. No. Not fresh from the package. The chewed up gunck aftermath. Thanks for the thought Lucas but this mom would probably prefer roses, carnations or dandelions.

Fishing in the Zoo?

It's that time of year where schools are trying to get in their class field trips before summer break.

Eli's class trip was to the Henry Doorly Zoo in Omaha.

He was so excited. I figured I'd hear all about lions, tigers, penguins and hippos. We did hear a story about the apes throwing "icky stuff" (use your imagination). The favorite and most talked about animal in the zoo.......the much maligned and totally under appreciated......catfish.

We heard about the size, color, whiskers, eyes. How it swims, where it swims and once again how big it was. His listening skills must have been at high performance. At the very end of his story he asked, "When you take me to zoo, I'll take my fishing pole and catch him and you will cook him." Apparently we need to work on the concept of a zoo and then make sure the fishing pole stays at home.

Ingredients

Well since my last post from the "salt mines", the saga (see previous post) has continued all week. Every time the boys sit down to a table it is to demand the ingredient list for each food item......I gave up at day 2 and told them flat out....."I don't know how much sodium is in that!"

So last Tuesday when we were coming back from a late baseball game we decided to swing through McDonald's and treat the boys and one of their teammates who rode with us to ice cream cones.

Why I didn't catch the train of thought...I don't know. One minute we are talking about the game, the next I'm being asked what makes ice cream. I'm used to answering questions all day long....it's the only excuse....or extreme fatigue and baseball game dimentia.....I rattled off the ingredients or as many as I could remember. Cream, sugar, vanilla, ice, eggs, salt...."oops".

You would have thought that I'd ran over the dog, backed up ran over their bikes, turned around and mowed over the trampoline, by the volume of screams from the backseat. Lucas was sure that he'd never be able to eat ice cream again, Eli was mad because I'd not told them it contained salt earlier so they could have known and the poor friend with us was rendered comatose by the unexpected behavior, concern and screaming. He wasn't quite sure why the boys cared about salt in the ice cream and I just didn't have any more explanations in me.

Needless to say they didn't turn down the salt laced, ice cream cones so perhaps we've come to terms with it and will not be quite so worried about sodium and the food it's in....or at least until they are older adults watching their sodium and blood pressure and I'm long gone and their doctors can deal with the explanations.

Salt of the Earth

You know when you are trying to teach your child a healthy eating lesson that you will only achieve success about 30% of the time if you are lucky. I was not lucky and this particular lesson landed squarely in the 70% unsuccessful bracket.

At lunch on Mother's Day, I was trying to explain to Lucas and Eli (and Mike) why they do not need to put extra salt on everything particularly when they haven't even tasted the food first.

Of course, we had the mandatory question of, "but why?" So I said, "because it's not good for your heart." Now while this isn't an in depth explanation, I'm just not up to explain high blood pressure and multiple other health issues......it's Mother's Day......I was giving myself a break....or so I thought.

Lucas' mouth dropped open, chicken half way in his mouth and he shouts, "WHAT! You not tell me this before? You always feed me salt! You not tell me it make me die! My heart will BLOW UP! I've been here a long time and you not tell me this!" Ok. None of those things were in my initial explanation and no we do not have a salt block on our table at mealtime.

Can you tell that one of our boys has a flare for the dramatic and if he knew what a blood pressure cuff was used for he'd insist on monitoring his. In the brief time since this health alert, Lucas is now the overseer of the salt shaker. If I'd known he would restrict Mike's salt intake, I'd have mentioned the heart blow up earlier.

Big Sister Has Reentered the House

Well Rachel has arrived home from college for summer break. Actually, she's been home for about a week. I'm not sure who is experiencing more culture shock.....her or her brothers.

Lucas and Eli have come to the conclusion, even though this is her second summer break since they've arrived home, that she must be having a hard time in college as she keeps coming back. Rachel, on the other hand, wonders which is harder, the Junior year of college or moving home for the summer and readjusting to two high energy brothers.

Most of the time it goes pretty well....some of the time.....it's a lot of very loud "discussions" also known as Lucas and Eli feeling the need to instruct her on EVERYTHING. If nothing else it let's Rachel have first hand experience on elementary aged kids and their assorted behaviors...good things for a future elementary/special ed teacher to possess.

Tonight at suppertime, Eli looks across the table at Rachel and informs her that when she is old he will take care of her.....when she dies he will cry. But she will be 89 years old so it will be ok. I'm sure Rachel was thrilled to know that he would miss her by that point but somewhat disturbed that he has the year of her death planned out. What can I say little boys like to talk about gross things, make strange sounds and occasionally plan things far in advance. Wonder what's in store for Mike and I.